Ministers can feel the pressure of being alone

One of the biggest challenges in ministry are the times a minister feels alone. Much of what we do is done apart from others. Whether it's working on next week's sermon, making a pastoral call, counseling someone struggling with life's issues, or preparing for an upcoming board or church meeting, we are often alone.

We feel alone when we have to make decisions that are not going to be popular with people in the church. Some pastors refuse to make such decisions, but anyone who is charged with leadership sometimes must make decisions that are not going to be acceptable to some people.

Pastors must often keep confidential things that people tell them. If the minister is carrying around a lot of information he or she cannot share with others, it can add to the stress.

In one study, feeling isolated and lonely was one of the top four reasons clergy identified for why they left the ministry. Burnout and depression can also happen when the minister feels isolated from others. In another study, 75 percent of those who left the ministry due to sexual misconduct reported feeling isolated from others and lonely.

This loneliness can carry over into the pastor's relationship with family. We're not always able to leave our ministerial concerns at the office, and at the same time we can't share them with family members either. It can create divisions in the family.

Fortunately, there are things we can do to minimize this pressure. One of the things I recommend is that every pastor have a Pastor's Prayer Team. While the minister cannot share private issues with the team, it is very helpful meeting with a group of people each week whose only agenda is to pray for the pastor and his or her family. I had such a team when I was a pastor, and they were a great blessing.

There are other things the minister can do as well. He or she can use the services of a coach or a spiritual director. Trusted colleagues can help carry some of the burdens as long as confidentiality is not violated. We must not forget prayer. Jesus invited all those who were heavy laden to bring their burdens to Him.

I go into more detail on these things the minister can do in my book The Healthy Pastor: Easing the Pressures of Ministry In it I also address other pressures ministers face and solutions to help ease each of them.