Several years ago I led some workshops for an annual denominational gathering. Also leading a workshop was Nelson Searcy, pastor of The Journey Church in New York. Both of us had books released in the months prior to the conference, and we were leading workshops built around those books. My workshop was held in the morning, and Nelson's was held later. I attended his workshop and was very impressed by the material he presented. Since then he has released a number of books, most of which I own.
This year his newest book The New You: A Guide to Better Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual Wellness was released. I am finding it a very helpful book for anyone and especially for those of us in ministry. Our personal well-being will directly impact our effectiveness in life and ministry. Many ministers I know are much better at caring for others than they are in practicing good self-care. I am one of those ministers. In this book he and Jennifer Dykes Henson offers very practical steps to take to become healthier in each of the areas listed in the subtitle.
In my reading this morning I came across a statement in the book that I thought was especially relevant for those of us in bivocational positions. He referred to a friend who runs the New York City Marathon each year. His friend has commented that life is a marathon, a statement with which Nelson disagreed. He wrote, "Life is not a marathon, and it shouldn't be looked at as one. Life is better viewed as a series of short sprints with periods of rest in between."
What a great way of thinking for bivocational leaders! I've written elsewhere about the danger of allowing our lives to get out of balance. With all the various demands on our time, this is easy to do. We can very quickly fall into the trap of believing that we have to respond to every request, every demand, and allow ourselves to get overloaded, overworked, and overscheduled. No one can keep up that kind of life style for very long. Trying to do so can lead to various health issues, both physical and emotional. I've been very open about my battle with depression during the mid-1980s, and much of that was directly due to trying to live life as a marathon.
We should not forget that God created the universe in six days and then rested for a day. You are not a slacker for taking time away from your responsibilities. Each of us needs time for refreshment and renewal if we want to live peak lives. But, I can guarantee that if you do not intentionally schedule such times they will not happen. Somebody, somewhere will need you to do something. I got to the point where I wrote on my calendar date nights for my wife and me. If somebody asked me to do something at that time I just told them I already had an appointment. It was NEVER a problem.
I have also appreciated the chapters on diet and exercise. They provided me with information I did not know about eating healthier (which I needed to know!), and I have already began implementing these changes into my life. I am currently about half done reading the book. I normally do not recommend books until I've finished them, but I want to encourage you to read this one. The material you'll find asks you to take small steps towards becoming healthier in every aspect of your life. Any of us can take small steps, and most of us need to.
Showing posts with label Well-being. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Well-being. Show all posts
Monday, February 11, 2019
Thursday, January 12, 2017
Exhaustion in the life of the minister
When a person writes a book he or she always believes that it is something that readers will find helpful, interesting, or entertaining. Otherwise, why write it?
I certainly believed that The Healthy Pastor: Easing the Pressures of Ministry would be one that many pastors would find helpful. As a pastor for 20 years and serving as a judicatory minister when I wrote the book I had known many pastors who struggled with the stresses often associated with ministry. I knew some who had allowed the pressures of ministry to cause them to become depressed or have physical illnesses often associated with stress. Some had dropped out of ministry because of the toll it was taking on them and/or their families.
Surprisingly, the book really hasn't sold very well. I would have loved to have had that book when I was in pastoral ministry. It might have helped me avoid a twelve-month battle with clinical depression. It certainly would have helped me better balance my life and ministry. But, for whatever reason, it hasn't found an audience.
Ministers have a difficult task. Most of us are expected to prepare and present one to three messages each week. In smaller churches we often have the primary responsibility to handle the administrative tasks of the church. Most of us are expected to attend the various leadership meetings that occur in our churches and provide input to each of them. In many churches the pastor is the primary person to visit members when they are in the hospital and guests when they visit the church. Funerals, weddings, and other events in people's lives will often include the pastor.
It's little wonder that our lives can get out of balance with the expectations placed upon ministers. Most ministers, including bivocational ministers, find that they are putting in a lot of hours trying to meet the various demands placed upon us. We often do not get proper rest, eat healthy, and spend enough time with family and on our own self-care.
We are called to serve a congregation that is made up of people who have a variety of needs in their lives that many expect the minister to help them solve. In addition, there are the new people who may begin to attend worship services and those who come to the church each month seeking financial assistance. Much of our time is spent around people with needs, some of them serious, and they expect us to be able to help them. Some get very angry if we are unable to do so, and we usually don't feel very good about it when we can't help as we would like.
Some of the people we serve can become very demanding and consume too much of our time if we allow it. I'm currently reading
The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it
by Dr. Henry Cloud. In the chapter on The Fuel for High Performance he cautions readers about properly managing their workload but goes on to remind us that "it's just as important to manage the energy sources around you. This is intensely interpersonal. People give energy, and they take it away. Know the difference and plan accordingly."
A workload that is out of balance will lead to exhaustion but so will spending too much time with "energy suckers." These are the people who do not respect boundaries and will try to monopolize your time. They are often people will serious needs who wants someone else to be responsible for addressing them. While we cannot ignore these folks nor their needs, we must also not allow them to control our lives. To be healthy we must spend time with others who are healthy who can energize and encourage us as we do the same for them.
The ministry pressures I discuss in my book are common to many of us in ministry. Each of them I have experienced in my own life or I've seen them at work in the lives of others. While these pressures often cannot be eliminated, they can be controlled and lessened so that your life and ministry is much more enjoyable and effective. Amazon has discounted this book from its original price so it might be a good time to buy a copy. I truly believe you will find it to be helpful to you.
I certainly believed that The Healthy Pastor: Easing the Pressures of Ministry would be one that many pastors would find helpful. As a pastor for 20 years and serving as a judicatory minister when I wrote the book I had known many pastors who struggled with the stresses often associated with ministry. I knew some who had allowed the pressures of ministry to cause them to become depressed or have physical illnesses often associated with stress. Some had dropped out of ministry because of the toll it was taking on them and/or their families.
Surprisingly, the book really hasn't sold very well. I would have loved to have had that book when I was in pastoral ministry. It might have helped me avoid a twelve-month battle with clinical depression. It certainly would have helped me better balance my life and ministry. But, for whatever reason, it hasn't found an audience.
Ministers have a difficult task. Most of us are expected to prepare and present one to three messages each week. In smaller churches we often have the primary responsibility to handle the administrative tasks of the church. Most of us are expected to attend the various leadership meetings that occur in our churches and provide input to each of them. In many churches the pastor is the primary person to visit members when they are in the hospital and guests when they visit the church. Funerals, weddings, and other events in people's lives will often include the pastor.
It's little wonder that our lives can get out of balance with the expectations placed upon ministers. Most ministers, including bivocational ministers, find that they are putting in a lot of hours trying to meet the various demands placed upon us. We often do not get proper rest, eat healthy, and spend enough time with family and on our own self-care.
We are called to serve a congregation that is made up of people who have a variety of needs in their lives that many expect the minister to help them solve. In addition, there are the new people who may begin to attend worship services and those who come to the church each month seeking financial assistance. Much of our time is spent around people with needs, some of them serious, and they expect us to be able to help them. Some get very angry if we are unable to do so, and we usually don't feel very good about it when we can't help as we would like.
Some of the people we serve can become very demanding and consume too much of our time if we allow it. I'm currently reading
The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it
by Dr. Henry Cloud. In the chapter on The Fuel for High Performance he cautions readers about properly managing their workload but goes on to remind us that "it's just as important to manage the energy sources around you. This is intensely interpersonal. People give energy, and they take it away. Know the difference and plan accordingly."A workload that is out of balance will lead to exhaustion but so will spending too much time with "energy suckers." These are the people who do not respect boundaries and will try to monopolize your time. They are often people will serious needs who wants someone else to be responsible for addressing them. While we cannot ignore these folks nor their needs, we must also not allow them to control our lives. To be healthy we must spend time with others who are healthy who can energize and encourage us as we do the same for them.
The ministry pressures I discuss in my book are common to many of us in ministry. Each of them I have experienced in my own life or I've seen them at work in the lives of others. While these pressures often cannot be eliminated, they can be controlled and lessened so that your life and ministry is much more enjoyable and effective. Amazon has discounted this book from its original price so it might be a good time to buy a copy. I truly believe you will find it to be helpful to you.
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