The importance of church hospitality

"We are the friendliest church in town."  I can't tell you how many times I have heard that from church leaders.  In fact, it is safe to say that I have yet to be in the second most friendliest church in any community in which I've been.  At least, that the case if I believe these church leaders are telling me the truth.  But, my experience has been that really isn't the case.  Most of these churches may be friendly, but they are often only friendly to one another, not necessarily to visitors.

As a judicatory leader for our denomination I am in a different church almost every week.  It is seldom I will be in the same church more than two times in a given year, and usually it will be only once.  From my experience many churches need some serious training in the area of hospitality.  They do not know how to welcome and receive guests to their church.  These people are often ignored on the one hand or embarrassed on the other.  Either no one speaks to them at all while they are at the church or they are asked to stand up and tell everyone who they are and where they're from.  Both scenarios are terrible violations of hospitality.

Few people want to be ignored when they go somewhere new.  They want to meet the people and see if they have anything in common with them.  They want to feel welcomed.  At the same time, they want people to respect their privacy.  Few people enjoy standing up in a room of people and introducing themselves.  Many people today want to be able to attend a church service and remain somewhat private.  While they don't mind meeting people individually they are not prepared to give a public statement about their reasons for being in attendance.  Churches often complain to me that visitors seldom return to their churches, and one primary reason for that may be the way they were treated when they were there.

Being treated as a visitor is not very welcoming.  Visitors are people who are unexpected.  They drop by, but nothing was planned for them.  Everyone ends up feeling somewhat awkward.  On the other hand, guests are expected and preparations have been made for them.  People are excited to see the guests because they had invited them and made sure things would be ready for them when they came.  A leader once asked if one reason some churches didn't have more first-time guests than they do is because God knows they are not prepared to receive guests.  If a time comes when these people decide to visit a church God directs them to those churches that is prepared.  I tend to think that leader is correct.

Some of the churches I serve have recognized they need training in church hospitality so I developed a workshop on that topic which I've led for several churches and one association.  I believe hospitality is a key to reaching and keeping new people, and it's too important to not be intentional about ensuring that the church offers good hospitality to everyone who comes there for worship.

Surprisingly, I've not found a lot of books or other resources on this topic.  By far the best book I've found is Fusion: Turning First-Time Guests into Fully-Engaged Members of Your Church by Nelson Searcy.  I believe every church leader should read every book Searcy has written, but this is the first of his books I read and it remains my favorite.  The subtitle should be enough to make you want to read this book.  Isn't that what every church claims it wants to do?  We want to reach new unchurched people and lead them into a personal relationship with God, help them grow as disciples, and become active members of our churches.  This book explains step-by-step how to effectively reach out to the unchurched people in your community and how to treat them when they do come to your church as well as how to follow-up with them after they've been there.  You will be hard pressed to find any book on ministry with more practical information than you'll find in this book.   One of the things that makes the book exciting for me is that the recommendations Searcy gives can be done by churches of every size.  Your church does not have to be Willow Creek to be able to do the things he recommends.

Most people decide whether they will return to a church within a very few minutes after arriving on your church property.  It happens long before the choir ever sings or the pastor preaches.   Their decision is based on what they see and what they experience in those first few minutes.  If a church is serious about wanting to reach new people it is critical that they become very intentional about providing great hospitality to every person who comes on their property.  This book will be a valuable resource for those churches that want to improve in this area of ministry, and it can be ordered by clicking on the above title.