The senior pastor had recently resigned, and the associate pastor preached the next Sunday. A member of the church told me that the associate isn't the best preacher the church has ever had, but everyone there knows that he loves them. She said they didn't always know that about the senior pastor.
"Pastor, do you love us?" is a question that many church members have. Now, I'll admit that some who ask that question aren't the most lovable people in the world, but they still want to know whether or not you love the people in the church. Do you see great value in them, and are you willing to sacrifice for them?
When I was pastor at Hebron I would occasionally say from the pulpit, "Sometimes you folks drive me crazy, but I love each and every one of you. You are my family, and I care more for you than many of you could ever realize." The fact is, they did know how I cared for them, and they loved my family and me in return. That doesn't mean that we never had differences, but it did mean that we related to one another in a spirit of respect and genuine concern and love for one another.
Pastor, perhaps the most important thing you could do is to find ways to let your congregation know you do love them. The cliche is true: People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. People will not follow a leader until they know that he or she has their best interest at heart. John Maxwell teaches that we need to touch a heart before we ask for a hand. Obviously, a leader could fake love in order to manipulate people into following him or her, but that would only work for a very short time. People would soon see through that.
How can you demonstrate your love for your people? There certainly isn't space in this blog to answer that in great detail, but here are some quick answers.
Commit to them. Believe me, churches whose pastors leave them every couple of years do not feel loved by their pastors.
Invest in them. Spend the time to get to know them and their families. Learn their hopes and dreams and passions. Discover their spiritual gifts and give them opportunities to minister accordingly.
Weep with them. Every family in a church will go through hurting times, and you need to be there with them during those times. You don't have to say great profound things in order to minister. Practice the ministry of presence.
Laugh with them. Be part of their celebrations such as birthdays and anniversaries. Attend the Little League games and other activities the children in which the children of your church are involved.
Tell them publicly. Often. And don't forget to smile a lot.
1 comment:
Agree with Dennis. I am NOT a pastor,but looking to serve in a rural church as pastor here in Texas. We are members of a new church that started up this past year. I asked the pastor if he would like to join us in prayer before the services and he said that he would be out front visiting with the people. I lead a Tuesday evening prayer meeting which the pastor does not attend as he lives over forty miles from the church and only comes to town on Sunday and Wednesday for a one hour Bible study time.
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