Pastor, do you love your people?

Read slowly the words from a retired Marine Corps major:

Perhaps the most obvious thing that leadership and love have in common is the act of caring about the welfare of others - an act that is central to both...A person who would call himself (or herself) a leader of Marines must be capable of love, of allowing themselves to be loved, and of understanding the awesome responsibilities incurred when one seeks and accepts the love of others.  The technical knowledge, the courage, the personal integrity so often discussed are definitely necessary.  Love though is what makes it work; it is what makes the followers willingly accept the technical knowledge and treat the courage and personal integrity as something to emulate rather than just applaud.

Love is not something I've often associated with military leadership, and especially not that of Marines, but I can appreciate what he is saying, and his comments have immense relevance to those of us in church leadership.  I once read that one of the primary questions smaller churches often have of their pastor is, "Pastor, do you love us?"  I don't think that is a question that should be taken lightly nor answered quickly.

Leadership is based on trust, and in a smaller church much of that trust is connected to relationships.  A pastor can go into a church with the proper educational degrees, a sound theology, and solid ministerial experience, but those attributes alone will not earn him or her the trust of the congregation.  "Pastor, do you love us?"  They want to know if you can see beyond their warts and issues and love them.  Words alone will not satisfy.  Such love must be demonstrated in the daily activities that go on in the life of the congregation.

After observing pastors for the past 30+ years I have to say that many of them did not love their churches.  They liked most of the people in their congregations and may have even developed a relationship with a few of them.  But, for the most part they viewed the churches they served as projects.  There were things there that needed fixed.  They hoped to be able to try out some of the new techniques of pastoral ministry they had read about or learned while attending a conference. Some pastors almost saw their churches as experiments, test-tube projects, and they wondered why they encountered so much opposition.  Perhaps they forgot that even lab rats don't like be experimented on.  This question about love is not one to take lightly.

Nor should you try to answer that question quickly.  Words are pretty cheap, and most smaller churches have heard the right words before.  After a few years they wonder how so many pastors who have expressed their love for this church could leave after only 2-3 years.  Put this in another context.  How would you feel if your new spouse was enticed to leave you for another person every 2-3 years?  While expressing his or her love for you that person always had the eye out for something that looked a little better.  Would you grow cynical after awhile?  That is exactly what has happened to many of our smaller churches, so don't be too surprised if they don't show too much excitement when you tell them you love them.  They want you to show them, consistently, day-by-day, over a long period of time, and then they will believe you...and then they will follow your leadership.

Pastor, do you love your people?  Give this question some serious thought in the days to come.