Monday, April 26, 2021

Church hoppers

 Every pastor dreads to hear a member of the congregation say, "We're not getting fed here and we've decided to leave for another church." This is seldom true. There are those occasions when a pastor is not preaching biblical truth, and people do need to leave a church, but this is not usually the case when people say these words. The reality is that many of them are "church hoppers," people who move from church to church attempting to find a place that will cater to their preferences and desires.

In my 35+ years of ministry most of the people I've seen leave a church did so because they were angry because they didn't get their way. Some were controllers who had perhaps ran the church for years before someone finally said no to them. When they couldn't threaten and bully to get their way they left to take their dysfunction to another church. Some had a different vision for the church and its ministry, a vision most of the church didn't share, so they left. They weren't angry; they just needed to find a church whose vision for ministry more closely matched their own. This is different than the ones who leave because they didn't get their way.

Some have a "What have you done for me lately?" attitude. I learned the hard way that no matter how much you help some people, they always demand more. When the help begins to slow down, they move on to greener pastures.

Church hoppers can have a fear of commitment. They are afraid if they stay too long in a church they will be expected to become involved. The only involvement they want is to attend a worship service when it's convenient. They don't want any responsibility, and they certainly don't want to be held accountable. The pastor of one church told me that their church was large enough that people could hide out there. That can't happen in a smaller church. Eventually, in a smaller church people are going to be invited to serve in some capacity, and that invitation is enough to cause some church hoppers to leave.

They may also have a fear of the shallowness of their faith being exposed if they stay too long. While the excuse may be that they are not being fed, the reality may be that they don't want to be fed. Often, they are not feeding themselves. Their faith might be described as a mile wide and an inch deep. There is no depth to their faith, no roots, and this shallowness will eventually be seen if they stay in a church long enough for people to get to know them well.

 When people complain about not being fed, pastors should take a look at their sermons to see if there is any truth in the complaint. It might be that some adjustments may be needed in the messages, but often pastors will find that there is no basis for the complaint. In that case, wish the people well as they continue their spiritual journey and bless them as they continue their church hopping.

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