This is the final post in this series of articles on common complaints often heard in smaller churches. I have never led a consultation with a small church that this wasn't mentioned at least once by the participants. The complaint usually comes from an older church member complaining that the younger members in the church are not willing to serve on various committees and boards and that their attendance at church services is often spotty. From that perspective the complaint often is valid, but I don't think it means that the younger ones are less committed than the older members.
The Builder generation were the ones who built many of the institutions we have in this country. That includes the churches. They were very committed to these institutions and gave both their finances and their time to seeing that the institutions functioned properly. When they moved to a new community they would visit a few churches of their denomination and quickly choose one to join where they would continue their faithful support. My generation, the Boomers, tended to be less committed to institutions but were more attracted to causes in which we believed. Future generations followed our example and became even less involved in institutional structures. Many had little, if any, commitment to a denomination but would choose a church based on how well it met their own needs. It was not uncommon for them to not join a church even if they attended there for years as church membership was not something they considered important. Nor were they interested in serving on a committee or board in the church. They often were much more interested in helping on a Habitat for Humanity house on Saturday than attending a church committee meeting. Younger generations are typically committed to activities they believe make a difference in people's lives, and many of them do not see that happening in many church committee meetings. To say they are less committed is not fair; they are committed but to different things than the older generations who often make the complaint.
The reason so many smaller churches struggle to attract younger families is because the only thing we can offer them is maintenance work on some committee or board. Many years ago I was trying to balance working a full-time job, serving as the pastor of a bivocational church, attending a Bible school, and being a husband and father. Reluctantly, I agreed to attend a monthly men's meeting of our association where I heard a message criticizing all the men who did not faithfully attend the meeting each month. The next month the meeting was held at our church, and when it was time for me to bring the message I told them I would be speaking on "Why I Don't Attend Your Men's Meetings." You could have heard a pin drop. Basically, I told them I didn't normally attend their meetings because they never did anything. As I explained, the highlight of their meeting was the refreshments served at the end, and I would just as soon spend that time with my family. This same message could be given to many of the churches that struggle to attract younger people.
Give a young person something to do that is in line with his or her gifts and passions and you will find someone with great commitment. Stop asking them to serve on some board or committee that could never meet again with little effect on the church and give them the freedom to minister to people and you'll find the commitment you're seeking. Recognize that when they have children they are being pulled in many different directions which often includes activities on Sunday mornings. Do not judge their commitment to God by how many church services and meetings they attend, but recognize that many reflect that commitment in ways that may be different than those of us in older generations.
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